My Birthday!!

Well, let's face it:  I'm not getting any younger - so, I think it's time to evaluate the type person I'm striving to be. From here on out there is no reliance on "someday" and there are absolutely no excuses.
Here's what I think of myself at the moment.

What I am:

a chatter box

What I want to be:

compassionate and kind

What I need to work on:

my relationships (mainly, making them a priority)

my overanalyzing

Goal: by August 8, 2013 I will complete 3 items from my to-do list, one of which will include visiting a foreign country. Dad is going to have a cow! (That's an expression of speech, my dad isn't literally going to have a cow- too many calories).

Reflection: Tonight I turned 21. It's supposed to be super cool, but can that one day between 20 years, 364 days and 21 make such a difference?

I think my year can be summed up easily. This was my heartbreak year. The entire year revolved around my growing from a significant relationship. I know, bring on the waterworks. But it's not really like that, it's not so dramatic. 

It was a year that altered my perspective in regards to the capability of people. I strongly believe that people are good and sometimes they just don't get the benefit of the doubt. No one is better than anyone else and the reason some people are angry, mean, or bitter is because they were wronged before and that's the best way they know to be. They need love. We all need love. Love is such a simple concept; when you love someone you look out for their best. Everything you do is not only done with that significant person in mind, it's done with nothing but their absolute best in mind. When you genuinely love- you come second, and you're alright with that. Isn't that how a mother loves her child? 

Anyways, this specific relationship made me doubt that all people are good. I'm not saying that he was rotten or anything, but he was selfish. He was selfish and ruthless. And you know what? Who cares? Life goes on. I understand that. But what I don't understand is how I got stuck with the short end of the stick. I feel like his selfishness left me in an uncomfortable state.

Since then I've been doing the strangest thing. I've been going out of my way to witness kindness. It's vital for me to see it and I've developed a keen eye for it. It's everywhere. And it's so quiet we hardly notice it. Kind and empathetic people are so rare, but they're a sufficient bunch.

I'm excited for this year, I plan on traveling and getting some things checked off my bucket list. Everything will work out just fine. Only life and death are permanent, nothing else. Anything that has been done can be undone. You have to make yourself the person you want to be, the details will work themselves out.